16 Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”
17 “We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered.
18 “Bring them here to me,” he said. 19 And he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves.Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. 20 They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over.
Matthew 14: 16-20 NIV
7min read
Even doubt appeared to cripple the disciples as they walked with Jesus during His time of ministry here on earth. They saw Him performing miracles right before their eyes. The healing of the sick, the casting out of demons, the rebuking of a storm, and even witnessing a tree wither at His command. And even so, doubt consumed them during moments when it seemed too overbearing to believe.
In the New Testament, the disciples witnessed many miraculous moments taking place in their presence. But one of my favourite was when ‘Jesus feeds the 5 thousand.’ From 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish, they were able to feed 5 thousand men, not including women and children. However, prior to this moment the disciples had spoken to Jesus, encouraging Him to disperse the crowd so that the people could go find something to eat. But instead of them finding their own food, Jesus tells His disciples to feed them with what they have, the 5 loaves and 2 fish. And as Jesus looks up to heaven, to bless the food and give thanks to His Father, He does so with a heart of gratitude. How often do we say thanks to God for what He has blessed us with? Whether it is a little or a lot, it is God’s provision in our lives. God does not need much to work through us to bless those around us. Just give Him what you have. Your words of encouragement, a helping hand, your acts of kindness or your heart of compassion…….our 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish.
The disciples are then motioned to feed the 5 thousand with what Jesus had placed in their hands. I believe Jesus is asking them, like us as followers of Christ, to minister to people around us who are in need. It doesn’t have to be anything miraculous, it doesn’t have to be a performance where the person is left bewildered, it needs to be a staple. Jesus gives us everything that we need and it is used to glorify our Father in Heaven. Often just our words, our testament of faith, a supporting hand, or our presence, is what might cause someone to feel the light of Jesus around them.
And then, multiplication is what appeared to happen there in that solitary place. From 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish, multitudes and multitudes of people were fed in their time of need. Don’t doubt how one small act of goodness in the name of Jesus, can be transformed into an abundance of blessings in ways that we could never understand. Take your brokenness and the trials of your life, and let the blessings that Jesus pours into your life, be blessings to the broken hearted and people around you.
17 The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.
John 21:17 NIV
So often in my prayer time, I pray that Jesus sends someone to minister to a person in need. To a family member that I love, to people around me who need the light of Jesus. And so often in return I feel the Holy Spirit convicting me, telling me….‘I’ve sent you.’ I believe this is why that desire in my heart is there to begin with. That person in my life is there so I can help minister to them and shower them with the light of Christ. Just like the disciples, everything was there for them to feed the people in front of them, they just needed to take a step of faith, believing that all things are possible through Jesus. But the truth is, often I don’t want to. It’s easier for someone else to do it, it’s prettier for someone else to do it, I don’t really know what I am doing. And the doubt comes rushing in. Jesus doesn’t ask me to do it perfectly, it doesn’t have to be all pretty. It needs to come from a place of love and truth. It needs to come from Jesus, His perfect and awesome will.
And after this miraculous moment of feeding the 5 thousand, the disciples are ushered by Jesus into a boat. The wind comes, the storm rocks the boat, the doubt from the troubles and trials of life comes rushing in. And so often I take my eyes off of Jesus and place them on my circumstances. Do you remember what I have done for you? Do you remember where I have taken you from? Nothing is impossible with the LORD. Do you believe?
27 But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
28 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
29 “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” 31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” 32 And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33 Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”
Matthew 14: 27- 33 NIV
When the wind dies down, the fog before us clears, we are able to see the move of God in our lives. Even though we might feel like we are drowning in fear, feeling abandoned or alone in that moment of need, Jesus is right there ushering us to Him. Pulling us out of the water, with His outstretched hand and calling us to draw closer to Him. To trust Him and submit to His ways. Let each step of doubt, cause us to stumble towards Jesus. He is not afraid of our doubt. Press into the doubt, and persevere in knowing who He is as our LORD and Saviour.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
15 The life of mortals is like grass,
they flourish like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.
Psalm 103: 13-16 NIV
God knows we are a reed, easily entangled with the troubles of the world. Let Him have your doubt and turn it into something beautiful. Do not hold onto shame when you doubt. Let your curiosity cause you to question, and He will guide you to His truth.
Do you trust in the finished work of Jesus?
Nadia x
All for His Glory.